What Is a Strap-On? Harness Types, Sizing and How to Use One
By the ToyFindr team · Updated
A strap-on is a harness that holds a dildo, worn so the wearer can penetrate a partner hands-free. People of any gender use them, for vaginal or anal sex, and the wearer can get stimulation too with the right setup.
Types of strap-ons
- Strap harness: adjustable straps around the hips and between the legs, sometimes two straps (jock style) for more stability. Fits a wide range of body sizes.
- Briefs or boxer harness: underwear with a built-in O-ring, comfortable and easy to put on.
- Thigh harness: a strap around the thigh, for different angles or for people who prefer it.
- Strapless strap-on: a bent dildo with a bulb that the wearer holds inside their own vagina; no harness, more skill to keep in place.
- Double-ended and vibrating options add stimulation for the wearer.
Choosing a harness and dildo
- O-ring: harnesses hold the dildo with a ring; the dildo's shaft must fit through it and its base must be wider than it. Many harnesses come with interchangeable rings.
- Dildo base: it must be flared to stay in the harness. Suction-cup bases usually work too.
- Size: choose the dildo for the receiving partner. A moderate diameter and length are best to start.
- Fit: check the harness size range and adjustability, and the materials (leather, nylon, neoprene, fabric) for comfort and cleaning.
Compare harnesses and kits in strap-ons.
Tips for using a strap-on
- Talk first about what you both want, and agree on a way to slow down or stop.
- Put the harness on and tighten it so the dildo sits firmly over the pubic bone; a loose harness is hard to control.
- Use plenty of lube on the dildo and the receiving partner.
- Start slowly, let the receiving partner guide the pace and depth, and try positions where you can see each other's reactions.
- Use a condom on the dildo when switching between anal and vaginal use or between partners.
Frequently asked questions
What is a strap-on used for?
For hands-free penetration with a dildo, for vaginal or anal sex, by people of any gender.
Do all dildos work with a strap-on harness?
No. The dildo needs a flared base that is wider than the harness O-ring, and its shaft has to fit through the ring.
Can the person wearing a strap-on feel anything?
The pressure of the base can be stimulating, and many setups add a bullet vibrator pocket, a double-ended dildo or an internal bulb for the wearer.
This guide is general information, not medical advice. If something hurts, feels wrong or you have a health condition, talk to a doctor.
