How to Use a Dildo: Choosing, Using and Cleaning One
By the ToyFindr team · Updated
A dildo is a non-vibrating toy for penetration, and one of the simplest toys there is. Getting the size and material right, and using enough lube, makes most of the difference.
Choosing a dildo
- Size: look at the insertable length and the diameter (girth). Diameter decides comfort more than length. Starting smaller is easier.
- Material: platinum-cure silicone, glass and stainless steel are non-porous and easy to clean. Realistic "skin" materials like TPE and PVC feel softer but can be porous.
- Firmness: firm toys suit G-spot and prostate pressure; dual-density toys have a firm core and a softer outside.
- Base: a flared or suction-cup base is required for anal use and lets you use it in a harness or stick it to a wall or floor.
Compare insertable lengths and diameters in dildos.
How to use a dildo
- Wash it before the first use.
- Get aroused first; foreplay or a vibrator helps.
- Apply lube to the dildo and your body. Use water-based lube with silicone toys.
- Insert slowly, a little at a time, at the angle that feels best. A curved tip angled toward the belly reaches the G-spot or prostate.
- Try different positions: lying back, on your knees, or riding a suction-cup dildo stuck to a smooth surface, which lets you control depth.
- For anal use, go even slower, use more lube and only use a dildo with a flared base.
Using a dildo with a partner
A partner can use it on you by hand, or wear it in a strap-on harness; see what is a strap-on. Use a condom on the dildo if you share it, and a fresh one when switching between partners or between anal and vaginal use.
How to clean a dildo
Wash with warm water and mild unscented soap or toy cleaner, rinse well and let it air-dry. Silicone, glass and steel dildos can usually be boiled for a few minutes or washed on a dishwasher's top rack if the maker says so. Porous materials cannot be fully sanitized, so keep them to one person and use condoms. More in how to clean sex toys.
Frequently asked questions
What size dildo should a beginner use?
Many people start with a diameter around 1 to 1.5 inches and a moderate insertable length, then size up once they know what they like.
How do you ride a dildo?
Use a dildo with a suction-cup base on a smooth, sturdy surface like a chair, floor or tile, add plenty of lube, and lower yourself onto it slowly so you control the depth and pace.
How do you clean a dildo?
Warm water and mild soap or toy cleaner after every use, then air-dry. Non-porous materials can usually be boiled; check the maker's instructions.
This guide is general information, not medical advice. If something hurts, feels wrong or you have a health condition, talk to a doctor.
